Wednesday, December 14, 2011


There are very few people I consider to be experts. This is probably because I have a Political Science Degree and therefore the complex to go along with it. Nevertheless two such people I believe to be experts are TSN's hockey god, Bob McKenzie, and current Kable Town executive John Francis "Jack" Donaghy (for extra credit I'll also say this guy is an expert in the field of music that I'm not cool enough to listen to).

On to the purpose of this post. Years ago when the giant Andrew Sutton played for a now forgotten hockey club, he once asked a reporter in a ill advised post game scrum if the reporter was an expert due to footage he saw during the game, and more specifically during a replay of a borderline body check performed by Sutton. Doesn't ring a bell?

Was the reporter an expert? Probably not, his name is not mentioned in the first paragraph of this blog post.

Andy Sutton however is an expert, an expert in violent hockey hits, some which have caused him to be hurt financially. Come with me as we take a look at some of the more notable "highlights" of this career in expertise.

Sid is lucky the Pens already played the Oilers
First let's take a look at some proof that Andy Sutton can be an effective clean yet devastating NHL hitting machine:

Could some of those hits be called charging? Yeah probably, but charging is one of those subjective hockey calls. Is Any Sutton a predator on the ice? Yes, but there is nothing wrong with that in a physical game like hockey, as long as he is able to hit cleanly and not hurt his team by taking penalties, or by being suspended, which has happened more than a few times over his career. 

Let's take a look at some of the dirty hits now which have caused Mr. Sutton to get a stern talking to, and watch a few games from the press box:

Saw the number, drilled Pascal Dupuis head first into the end boards. Looks like Dupuis may have been knocked out and is lying in a pool of his own blood too for good measure. Sutton received 2 games.

The incident that sparked the expert interview. No suspension for this hit, though it probably would have been this year. May have targeted the head, may have gotten the elbow up a bit, I'm no expert. Were this hit to take place in the regular season it may have been suspension worthy, in the past the NHL has made it clear it won't suspend players in the playoffs unless it is absolutely necessary.

That brings us to this season, take it away Brendan Shanaban:

Pretty cut and dry there, Sutton almost only hit him in the head. Most interesting part of the video is that Shanahan mentions Sutton has been fined in the past. Fines the don't include a suspension do not have to be disclosed to the public. Further digging has uncovered that Sutton has been fined over SEVEN times for on ice incidents. That is fairly significant.

Fast forward, Sutton misses his 5 games, is force to donate some of that sweet $2.125 million contract to the NHL Player Emergency Fund, and he's back on the ice. I can't remember what happens next....

Sometime during his first shift of the game, which I was lucky enough to attend, I turned to my buddy and said "Every time Sutton is on the ice I get a feeling that something dirty is going to happen."

That night Sutton's stat line read: 1 assist, 2 minutes for boarding, 2 minutes for boarding, 5 minutes for fighting, totaling 9 minutes in penalties in just over 18 minutes of ice-time. Sutton was a +2 and has given the 3rd Star by TSN. Of course that doesn't the "clean" hits including a knee on Eric Staal in the first period that resulted in Staal receiving an unsportsmanlike penalty and his devastating third period open ice hit on Jeff Skinner which I cannot find video footage of. It is interesting to point out though that although the hit was deemed clean, Jeff Skinner has not played since and is out with an "undisclosed injury." Read into that what you will.

The big talking point from that game though, since the Oilers really shat the bed, was Sutton's second boarding penalty. Again let's turn to an expert in his own right, Brendan Shanahan:

The Oilers did not make Sutton available for interviews after the game. Probably the wisest decision that club has made since signing Corey Potter in the offseason (I thought about saying since they kept RNH in the show but come on, that was a gimmie!)

Recently Sutton has opened his mouth about the incident to say how he feels the system is not doing him any favours. While he may or may not be right about the suspension hearing system in the NHL, he is certainly not doing himself any favours by coming out with quotes like this following suspensions:

This one released through the Oilers after recieving 5 games for the Landeskog hit: "I have been informed of and understand the League's decision, however, I had no intention of delivering an illegal check.  For 14 years, I've always played the game with respect and integrity and I will continue to do so when I return."

And this one released without club censorship following his current 8 game ban for the above hit: “They make their decisions and unfortunately you have to live with them. I really don’t have much recourse in any way shape or form...” 
Obviously the public isn't privy to these discipline hearings, but I doubt these quotes and Sutton's obvious violent history will help him during his next hearing. And there WILL be a next hearing.

Sutton's 8 game suspension makes him next available to the Edmonton Oilers on December 31st, when the Oilers play one of Sutton's old teams,  the New York Islanders.

Thursday, December 8, 2011

The Leafs Get Unlimited Texting....According To Their Contract

Well well well, in one of the more interesting NHL ownership squabbles of late it looks as though that group of communist Ontario teachers have sold their stake in MLSE (The Leaf, Raptors maybe, and some futball team no one like) to a group consisting of Canadian media giants Bell and Rogers.

The real question here is how will things be different, and are their any jokes to be made at the expense of Toronto Maple Leafs and their new owners that don't involve texting (NSFW and sorry).

Casual television watchers (like if you are a Big Bang Theory or X-Factor supporter, fools) and cell phone users must be wondering how these two competitors will be able to work together and they may be surprised to learn this is not the first time they have.

Remember that thing with the fire and ice and hockey and Crosby? You know that event that brought a peaceful nation together at last? It was the Olympics, the other sporting event that happened in Vancouver that didn't result in a riot.

For decades the CBC was the sole media entity that brought you coverage of the Summer and Winter Olympics in Canada. That all changed when two media giants (in Canadian terms) came together and out bid the crown corp. I am of course talking about the entity known as Canada's Olympic Broadcast Consortium. I lovely entity which Joshua Staav and I once stole Coke Zero from which was comprised Bell Media and Rogers Media.

So likely Toronto FC will now have a new home on Omni Television, which really makes sense when you look at their demographics. That's not racist.

Both networks already play as many Leafs games as they possibly can, so that won't change. Maybe the networks will work together to give people who watch the Leafs games the best possible in game analysis, though that really just means watching the TSN feed and letting Jeff Marek on the panel.

"But Dan," says the astute reader (singular) of my blog who was in my Vancouver Olympics course at Brock University (name drop), "I knew all about the Olympic Consortium, I remember watching Olympic highlights brought to me by hipsters in a hot tub and watching Biathlon on Omni, and recaps on RDS. Give me something new!"

Settle down imaginary person. Years ago did you know that Rogers Sportsnet and TSN shared office space in a building in Scarborough, Ontario? and further more they shared a parking lot?

From 2001 to 2008 the two competitors shared the Agincourt complex. Altercations were few and far between even though Bob McCowen often said on air he enjoyed throwing bottles at the TSN studios. Competing Anchors Shawn McCormick (of Sportsnet and drunken Oilers/Leafs game fame) used to carpool with his wife and Jennifer Hedger (of TSN and yelling at Shawn at said hockey game fame) to work.

But alas all was not well in sports media land. Darren Dregor crossed the parking lot (without being compared to a female dog by Peter Mckay, Canadian politics joke), started wearing nice suits and joined the TSN crew. Sportsnet moved downtown and TSN remained the only thing of substance in the Scarborough area.

So the two networks CAN work together.

Will this change the way they report on the NHL and it's favourite son, The Toronto Maple Leafs? Probably not. I mean I'll probably make tampering jokes every time anyone on either network talks about trade rumours but let's me honest, Brian Burke controls what they talk about anyway and both national networks are already huge homers for the blue and white. I was going to put a link in here but it seem like a waste of time, just check out the network websites, there is probably a story about what a good captain Dion Phanuef is or how the Leafs are right on the path Brian Burke envisioned for them three seasons ago.

I guess the Score is a little weaker, but I know of a couple hockey teams in the Toronto area that could use the sponsorship anyway.

On the plus side I assume that Leafs players will no longer have any issues with their cell phone plans, and those pesky roaming charges when they use Twitter on road trips will be waved. Who am I kidding everyone has a problem with their cell phone plan unless your name is Nathan Reboh.

I wonder is Damien Cox will still be critical of the Leafs, probably not, but you have to ask, right Damien? 

This isn't that exciting, I'm going back to listening to The Clash and doing all that other stuff that is supposed to get creative people out of the funks they put themselves in.

Saturday, September 24, 2011

Oiler Spill Podcast: Season 2, Episode 2: Greg The Dentist

Sup peeps.

This week my guest is the world renowned 0-2 sports specialist Greg The Dentist.

We talk NHL Preseason even though it doesn't interest me, then quickly switch gears to the NBA labor dispute and a NFL Week 3 Preview.

We then take a look at Fantasy Football in the first of many Fantasy Focus segments brought to you by our friends at the EJHL.


If you want to contribute in anyway to the Oiler Spill Podcast, with questions, comments, anger, or if you think you should be a guest or want to contribute financially send me an e-mail or tweet me.

Otherwise enjoy this bear cubs video:

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Oiler Spill Podcast: Season 2, Episode 1

In this episode MG3 joins me to discuss the most important part of my life, sorry mom, television. We talk about the week that was in good TV, what we are looking forward to this coming fall, and what we miss.

Also zombies are the new vampires.

Count the Bill Simmons references and win a prize!


Saturday, September 3, 2011

The Fantasy Football Edition

For most fantasy nerds the draft is the most sacred event known to man. A few friends and I decided to start our own league this year and this guy is the commissioner.

That may or may not have been a huge mistake.

A day before the draft the responsible thing to do would be to go over stats, look for sleepers, you know junk that helps you feel smarter than everyone else in these things. What did I do?

I spent the night watching Batman and Robin (George Clooney is the only Batman) and Air Bud (it doesn't say anywhere in the rule book that a dog can't play basketball...).

Remember kids, just because you have a world class choice of films at your disposal doesn't mean you have to use them. 

Then of course being the responsible adult that I am, I joined my friends at midnight for an extended night of stupidity.

11 AM comes and my phone rings. I answer the phone with my massive headache and am greeted my a yelling Greg The Dentist asking if I'm ready for the draft and how I should be pumped and ready to go.

After clearing my throat I explain that I am not ready, and plan on going back to sleep since I still have all day to prepare, because brilliantly I set the draft time for 5 EST, which obviously means the draft will be taking place at 7 PM Mountain Standard Time.....

Greg was nice enough to correct me without pointing out my stupidity and thus my day began.

With no time to spare I printed off Matthew Berry's draft list I assembled the staff for what was to be a quick lunch provided by our friends at Boston Pizza and recap from the missing scenes from the previous night.

Fast forward through the lovely meal and it's 2:00 and we need to get our asses in gear, especially since keep in mind I am the commissioner.


According to Oiler Spill staffer MG3 "drafting a fantasy sports team is the gayest thing you can do" MG3 then proceeded to go home where he packaged feathers fo sale to be placed in woman's hair for the rest of the day. 

Next stop Safeway because Producer Farrel wants a draft magazine, clearly he is going to win this pool looking for a magazine with under an hour before the draft begins. After 15 minutes of deciding between a fantasy magazine and the issue of GQ with Mark Sanchez on the cover (Farrel has a huge crush on Mark Sanchez) we were back at Draft Central and ready to go.

You wanna see the results? Yeah you do. Click THIS.

So on to the point of this post (these things have points now? I hope they're not sharp. Zing) I want a super active message board and tons of chirping, that's what makes H2H leagues great.

As Commissioner I should write a team re-cap post and make fun of everyone in it. Here's the problem, I don't know enough about football to make fun of the teams. I don't want to pull a Gordan Ramsay and just say everything is fucking shit.

Personal insults I can handle, I mean half the teams are guys in Calgary, and Farrel has a hard on for Mark Sanchez. What I need is good football chirps.

So if you haven't already, check out the league and teams (Click THIS), and then leave your best as comments or e-mail or tweet them to me. or

This has to happen soon so I don't look weak.

-Star Wars

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Jerseys I Stole From Children

Shea Weber was awarded a contract that was large enough to put Nashville past the cap floor. That's it  unless your a Leaf fan then all that matters is the Leafs tried unsuccessfully to steal the spotlight by announcing they have opened talks with Luke Schenn. Idiots.

For a few years (too many) I worked at a Summer camp in Pine Lake Alberta. As a councillor I was basically a summer dad to a bunch of kids that were living in a cabin with me. I had to watch out for them make sure they ate, etc etc.

Every year at this Summer camp there is one night where the staff hold a T-shirt trade. Everyone sets up a table with their goods and swaps their old tattered shit for other peoples. Hockey jerseys are high end items at these events, especially those belonging to younger staff members or older campers who are invited to participate. Some people really took advantage of the kids. I only sorta did.

Ah the Todd MacFarlane Oilers 3rd jersey. What a gem! At the time my lack of funds meant I could not purchase this jersey which seemed to be responsible for wins during its inaugural season. Thank God (or the Loch Ness Monster) for the T-Shirt Trade!

Whatever I gave up I won this deal since I probably bought it at Value Village earlier that summer. Maybe a small Rangers jersey? who knows. I really wish that the Douch (settle down it was his nickname) took better care of the jersey though, the sperm tail is all worn out and warped. I've put so many books on top of it but it still looks crappy. I think I've ironed it....maybe tomorrow. Also h lost the strings.

Got this one from a kid whose nickname was Nuts. I really hope these kids weren't picking out their own nicknames. Just plain brutal.

This is a cool one. Originally I made some steal of a deal where I got traded a bunch of Value Village shit including a University of Michigan Jersey and I think a Phoenix Coyotes Jersey for a new at the time Flames Jersey (the red one with the black logo) and a Toronto Maple Leafs Brian Leetch jersey. 

I was quite proud of myself and my haul and making my way to a staff cabin where some after hours trading was taking place (real high stakes shit) when the camper approached me. He said he felt really awful about giving up his Leafs jersey so I decided to be nice and gave it back to him. He gave me back the Coyotes jersey which is crazy small and something else I can't remember. Anyway I hung on to the Flames jersey for about 5 minutes. 

I don't want a Flames jersey to I swapped it straight up with another veteran trader Big Bad Brad for this 2000 Team World All-Star Jersey. It's one of my favorites to wear while I'm playing and I've often thought about wearing a tie to go along with the collar.


This is the nicest jersey I've ever traded for easily. It's also the only time I really felt like a was stealing. Donkey (more great names) got this jersey from his parents as a grad present or something like that. Why they got him such a big jersey I don't know but it didn't really matter to me.

That is a Colorado Avalanche third jersey with Patty Roy on the back. What a beauty. I never wear the thing since it is an XL and an Avalanche jersey, but a nice addition to my collection none-the-less. 

Tuesday, July 26, 2011


Kris Draper blah blah blah

New arena financing blah blah blah

Now that that is out of the way let's check out another beauty jersey in Dan's ridiculous collection, this one is a nice one!

Back in 2007 I did a little European vacation. I only brought one piece of Oilers gear with me, somehow, and I really only wanted to wear it in one country.
I like Sykora big whup wanna fight about it?

Yeah that's right, I was a Petr Sykora fan. I was hoping many Czech people would see this shirt and think it was awesome. Unfortunately that was not the case. If you're not Jagr or Hasek in the Czech you may as well be Jani Rita. 

I decided I wanted to either buy a Hemsky, Sykora, or Nedved jersey, or find myself while I was in the Czech Republic. Luckily just as I was about to start some crazy introspective thinking I stumbled across this gem in the Czech Republic version of a Sport Czech (see what I did there):

so 2000 or 4000 fake dollars later this Czech National jersey was mine and I never had to start thinking about why I'm on this earth. 

Important things to notice: The Nike mark. Yep this is one of them fancy Nike Swift jersey's. I wear it in the rain and for the most part water beads off of it. It is made of a stretchy material and both the graphics and the name and number are sticky silk screen. It also looks great on me when I play, just fits great. 
Got that IIHF logo and everything! The only really unfortunate thing is that it is a Czech Republic National Team jersey. When can I wear this without seeming anti-Canadian hockey and getting lynched? Most recently I wore it to a final exam while in St. Catharines, I'm fairly sure the marker who is a huge Jags fan gave me a couple extra marks because of it. 

Fuck it I'm wearing it today!

Obviously I had to buy more stuff while over there:

A significantly cheaper looser fitting Jagr jersey! Because it's not as nice this is the Jagr jersey to wear while playing hockey. While in England, I wore this during my last University American Football game. I didn't start or play particularly well during that game, and I blame the jersey. The shoulders are a little worn because of the football pads, I wore big ones, I was a small linebacker. 

By wearing this jersey though I was able to trick the team into thinking I had already returned my team jersey. That was until photos of me wearing it in Canada surfaced on Facebook. Ha! #94

Monday, July 25, 2011

Jersey's are Cool

Greeting sports fans!

It's been a relativly boring NHL offseason but I was recently inspired by this tweet by NBC Hockey Blogger Joe Yerdon

If you're too lazy, lord knows I am, the point is that he included this picture of a rack containing all of his hockey "jersey's" (does calling them sweaters make me a hockey hipster? arg, I liked jersey's before they were cool...) :

It just so happens that we at Oiler Spill also have an idiot that spends too much money on hockey swag. So since the offseason is boring, and if you want to read some blog post about how nice of a guy Kris Draper was you can visit any other site, we will be featuring a new jersey and story behind the jersey for the rest of the summer. 

Dan: This is the Oilers jersey I wore for most of the Oilers Stanley Cup run of 2006. I think I may have let my girlfriend at the time wear it too. I commemorated that by adding the Stanley Cup patch to it. No name on the back, had to buy into the Oilers playoff philosophy obviously of team first etc etc (ed note: turns out there was one player who put himself ahead of the team.... what was his name again..... oh well). I guess it is important to note that I did not wear this jersey when I travelled to Carolina for Game 7. I went with white because I wanted to match the team. The white jersey is gone know, all of my white jersey's were stolen back in 2008 or 2009 with my hockey bag out of my brother's garage. Too bad so sad.

What is there besides Dressing Room Access???

The pin was a gift from the anonymous hockey blogger Eklund who I met in an Airport on my way to Carolina, possibly Atlanta or Calgary, I can't remember. He also gave me a 2006 Stanley Cup Playoff statistics guide, I have no clue where that is. I may have pawned it for Mcflurry money. 

I bought the jersey back in 2003/04 when I worked at Bata Athletes World. We were selling them super cheap for the Heritage Classic, my friend Eyton Landin bought a Habs one. Interesting side note, by boss at Athletes World who often would tell us stealing from the store was stealing from his family and hurting his ability to provide for them was terminated after it was uncovered he was doing fake returns on his credit card. Idiot.

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Operation Re-Brand, Staff Playoff Pool

Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, welcome to Oiler Spill COYOTE HOWL! Your number one choice this playoff season for every bit of information about your favorite NHL playoff team.... The Phoenix Coyotes!

So while the Edmonton Oilers are a dead corpse floating in the North Saskatchewan River, the Phoenix Coyotes are alive and well, and clearly have the full support of this blog. In other words Oilers fans, I've turned heel. Awooooooooooooo! Let's go desert dogs! Coyote Howl staff playoff pool info, and predictions after the break.

Coyote Howl Staff Playoff Pool

The rules are simple. Each member of the staff had to choose who would win each series. Who ever does the best in each round of the playoffs gets six beers of his choice from each loser. So the winner gets a minimum of 12 beers. If no one wins, the beers are all banked for the next round.

In addition, any staffer who goes under .500 in the first round has to pay up 12 beers instead of six.
Let's get to the meat of it, here are the picks:

The Wild West
#8 Chicago vs #1 Vancouver

Farrel: Vancouver. For me this was an easy choice, The Canucks were by FAR the best team in the regular season and the Blackhawks barely made the playoffs. The Canucks are stronger at every position, this is their year, and more importantly this is the year they get over their Blackhawks playoff woes. Luongo doesn't have that silly captaincy hanging over his head, and Kesler has taken his game to the next level. Also without Ladd and Byfuglien, is the hate even still there for the Canucks? This will be an easy win.

Leo: Vancouver.

Dan: Chicago. Okay, let me start by saying this has more to do with my hatred for the Canucks than anything else. The Canucks are by far the stronger team skill-wise and physically. Mentally though I'm not convinced. They won't come out and say it but I think this is the last matchup the Canucks wanted. For the Hawks the core that won the Stanley Cup last year is still present. Sure there have been a couple changes but Crawford is just as good as Niemi and Brouwer can do Byfuglien's job in front of the net just fine. The chirping has already begun and I agree with former Canuck Ryan Johnson, the Canucks are not ready to beat the Blackhawks.

#7 Los Angeles vs #2 San Jose

Farrel: San Jose.

Leo: San Jose. No Kopitar, no way the Kings can win. Also, it's nice to see Dustin Penner is playing they way Oilers fans have come to expect him to play.

Dan: San Jose

#6 Phoenix vs #3 Detroit

Farrel: Detroit. I shouldn't need to explain this to anyone, even if you are part of Yotes Nation now. Detroit is better, Detroit will win. How many 20 goal scorers does Phoenix have again?

Leo: Phoenix.

Dan: Phoenix. Gotta disagree with both of you boys, and it's not just because I chose to re-brand the site. I don't believe the Wings are 100%. Jimmy Howard got hurt recently against Toronto, he will probably play but who knows how good he will be. Also Henrik Zetterberg is hurt. The Coyotes have a strong over all team that plays hard every night for their coach, who I do believe is stronger than Babcock, in Dave Tippet. Bryzgalov has a real chance to prove he is the best player in this series, and let's not forget this is a contract year for him.

#5 Nashville vs #4 Anaheim

Farrel: Anaheim.

Leo: Anaheim.

Dan: Anaheim. The Duck's top line is the best line in hockey right now. This is a classic D vs O matchup and I think the Ducks O is too much to handle. Even if the Preds can somehow stop the trio of Ryan, Perry, and Getzlaf, The Finish Flash is just itching to take center stage and score more big goals. If the Ducks get even half decent goaltending from Ellis/Emery/Hiller this will be an easy series. Mark my word, The Nashville Predators will not be one of #DanEllisProblems.

The Wild East
#8 New York vs #1 Washington

Farrel: Washington.

Leo: Washington. Another easy decision. This series has sweep potential written all over it. The Rangers are not a good team.

Dan: Washington. Okay settle down, I'm picking the Caps but I'll defend the Rangers for a second. Henrik Lundqvist is good enough to steal a game or two. I'm also not 100% sold on the Capital's goaltending, after all, the Rangers did finish the season with a stronger goal differential that the Capitals. But yeah, this is the Cap's series to lose.

#7 Buffalo vs #2 Philadelphia

Farrel: Philadelphia.

Leo: Philadelphia. This Flyers team had one goal going into this season, and it was to win the Stanley Cup. They might be the deepest team in the playoffs this season. Versteeg was a great addition. Their one weakness might be in net, but tell that to Michael Leighton, and by the way, Bobrovsky is better. Also who is going to score for the Sabres?

Dan: Philadelphia. The tiny twins of Gerbe and Ennis are going to get beat up by the Broad Street Bullies.

#6 Montreal vs #3 Boston

Farrel: Boston. Another easy choice, not only are the Bruins a better team, they got emensly better around the Trade Deadline when they picked up Tomas Kaberle. Between Horton, Lucic and Chara, the Bruins are going to punish the Canadiens both physically, and on the scoresheet. Have you been waiting for PK Subban and Carey Price to show signs of struggle this season? Well you won't have to wait much longer.

Leo: Boston.

Dan: Montreal. I still believe The Bell Centre is one of the toughest buildings in the league to play in, especially for a Boston Bruin. Carey Price has made the Hab's faithful forget about Jaro Halak. Cammalleri will be just as good as he was last year. For me the Canadien's success depends on Scott Gomez, he has got to up his game, and clearly based on my selection, I think he will.

#5 Tampa Bay vs #4 Pittsburgh

Farrel: Tampa Bay.

Leo: Tampa Bay. Dwayne Roloson and Marc-Andre Bergeron? I've seen that script before and it goes all the way to the Stanley Cup Finals! Stamkos and St. Louis are unstoppable and the addition of Eric Brewer has made their defence a very tough group to play against. Jordan Staal can't carry the load by himself.

Dan: Pittsburgh. Without Crosby and Malkin in the lineup the Lightning will be taking this Penguins team for granted and that is a huge mistake. After watching 24/7 everyone knows Dan Bylsma is one of the best coaches in the league and while Jordan Staal is no Crosby, he is a great two-way center. Dwayne Roloson is old and has been inconsistant all year, on the flip side after a shaky start, Marc-Andre Fleury has been fantastic, he will win this series for the Penguins. Also, he is by far the best Marc-Andre in the series.

Who is going to win?

Way to go out on a limb there Farrel and Leo. My prediction is you guys are squids, and I'm not going to have to pay for a beer all summer! Thoughts? Predictions? Leave a comment, send me an e-mail: or follow me on Twitter: @TheRealDanMoser.

A more comprehensive Coyotes vs Red Wings preview is coming up, in the mean time stay strong Yotes Nation. Awooooooooooo!

Podcast, Draft Lottery, Playoffs? Playoffs!

In case you haven't noticed by now, Oiler Spill has had a major overhaul. More on that later. For now, click play and enjoy an episode of an epic 3-way podcast featuring current Torontonian and J-school sports junkie Lawrence Dushenski, Edmontonian and all around hockey expert Chris Button, and myself, the idiot blogger.

In this episode we talk draft lottery, what does it all mean? Who will the Oilers go after?

Playoff matchups, who will win, and better yet, why will they win?

Enjoy, it's a gooder! 

Friday, April 8, 2011

An Old Yet New Eulogy For Your Edmonton Oilers

Editors note: I forgot I had a blog there for a while, to be fair the Oilers forgot how to play hockey for while, so we'll call it even (pause for laughter). This "eulogy" was written back in October, before the season started because I knew eventually the season would end, and I thought it would be fun. Commentary has been added in parentheses and the links are all current and updated like this one. Enjoy!

An Oilers Eulogy. Or, There Are No Surprises in Alberta
By Dan Moser

Well the season is over, and boy was it fun. I know it's not actually over, we are at game 70 but the Oilers have clinched 30th place so the season is over for them (close but not perfect). Let's be serious though, other than that brief bright spot in the middle of the season (well, the first game of the season), and the play of the rookies, this season has once again made me forget what NHL hockey in Edmonton looks like. Oh well, here comes another first overall draft pick. I hope Adam Larrson looks good in orange and blue (wouldn't be shocked to see Ryan Nugent-Hopkins picked, either way). Let's get onto it!


Another year, another statistically disappointing year from the forwards. Once again Dustin Penner, who hit 30 goals again, and Ales Hemsky, before his injury, have proven they are the only Oiler veterans that can score consistently (If you claim you saw Ryan Jones coming you are lying). The Oilers continue to have a huge problem down the middle, Shawn Horcoff has been consistently Shawn Horcoff, and I'm pretty sure I could win a faceoff against Andrew Cogliano.

Let's try and be positive for a second though, The five games the team got out of Gilbert Brule were alright. Sam Gagner has emerged a very poor team's number one centre (I had hoped). Jean Francios Jaques has come out of his shell, played a mostly injury free season and looks to be an effective energy player (sigh, sorry).  

For me personally the biggest positive has come in former Stanley Cup Champion Colin Fraser who has stepped up and become a decent third line option for the Oilers. He plays with confidence and give 100% every night. His knack for defensive play and ability to win a faceoff have made him a mainstay on this team (Let's just all forget I wrote this paragraph).

The Rookies

Taylor Hall. Taylor Hall. Taylor Hall. The kid has skill and proved it, don't be shocked to see him step and and receive that Calder Trophy this year in Vegas (I'll blame the injury). Before the season began I often said he was the most NHL ready player on the team and boy was I right. Leading an NHL team in scoring as an 18 year old (Do you think Taylor Hall knows what POGS are?) is no easy feat, and I cannot wait to see him continue to improve and grow next season. Also despite being an Oiler, the kid just does not know how to stay down or get hurt (close). I might even buy a jersey.

Jordan Eberle has also had a great season. He hit the 20 goal mark, which is fantastic, and just think of what might have happened had he not gotten hurt late in the year (almost right). Eberle is a sniper, he scores amazing goals and has a great shot, his defensive game could use some work though.

Although he was billed to possibly be the best of the rookie, Magnus Paajarvi has had some struggles. This season was about learning the North American game for him and he is well on his way. Personally I wouldn't mid seeing him at center or possibly playing the point on the powerplay (check). His skating ability and size make him an option at both these spots.


Ryan Whitney was the bright spot this season, of course that was before his season ending knee injury (did I get that one? Was it the knee?). He is a great number two in this league and will continue to be the focal point of this back end unless a trade is made in the offseason.

Kurtis Foster was, well pretty much what we all expected. His point totals took a hit from last season, seen Stamkos? Also I can't believe he ever played on Minnesota the way he is in his own zone what oh well, you get what you pay for, At least he has that shot that has made us forget about Souray (err umm, yeah...)! Seriously though, if I have to here about his old icing injury again that's it I'll never say another nice thing about him.

Theo Peckham has been physical, which has been a nice change of pace, and Jeff Petry looks like he might be ready to play full time. Smid is the same player as he was when he was traded to Edmonton.

Tom Gilbert was out of place on this team as a number two, but the way he has played since being traded has been great for him. A change of scenery may have been exactly what he needed. Hopefully the prospect and pick the Oilers got for him turn out to be players (I wonder how I thought Gilbert could be moved. Just change his name to Penner, same thing). 

This season the Oilers goaltenders didn't win them games, but they didn't cost them games either. When a team can't score, the only way they'll win is by shutout. The Oilers need some fresh goaltending stat. 

Sure the Oilers didn't have the most man games lost this year, but the players they lost were almost all of a significant nature. Despite the great season he was having, Ales Hemsky once again had to shut down his season early because of his wonky shoulder (I thought it would be the same shoulder he hurt last season, not the other one!). Injuries to both Gagner and Horcoff made the Oilers even weaker down the middle, and with the amount of games Brule played this season, it was easy to forget he was an Oiler.

Penner and Cogliano may have played the whole season, but really with the amount of games they didn't show up for, you could just call them injured too.

Whitney, Vandermeer and Smid (close enough) all went down as well forcing the Oilers to once again call on rookies on defence who were not ready to play the NHL paced game.

Next Year

It's probably too early to call it, you know with free agency and what not, but right now the Oilers will not make the playoffs next year. There better be some improvement though, anyone remember what meaningful hockey in March feels like?

Well, at least Calgary didn't make the playoffs either (bingo).

Check out the link below for a pretty cool radio show featuring Brett Hart. If you claim you don't like the Hitman you are lying plain and simple.

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Goalie: A Breed Apart

I was approached today by a fan of the site, one puck buddy Bob, and asked if I would do a post listing some crazy goalies. I have decided since no one has ever asked me specifically to do a post on something I better do it!

Here is some personal background. A couple Sundays ago I played a men's league game. I'm a goalie. The team I played for decided it might be fun to never take the man in front, and not play defence but just watch as the opposing team was given scoring chance after scoring chance. I knew the only way I was going to get any help that night was to help myself. So in the spirit of Billy Smith and Ron Hextall and other greats I played a chippy game. I was whacking guys, slashing guys, hell I even thought about hip checking a guy when he came in on a breakaway! I got a couple texts after the game from friends on the opposing team. I even ran into one at a gala event this past Sunday. "You slashed me pretty good there." he said, and my response "I sure did."

Now I'm riled up. Lets take a quick trip down memory lane. Aw hell, lets just make this story number 8 in my list of Crazy Goalies. Not really in a particular order. I tried not to include the cliches, hence the top 8 list. I don't need to tell you how insane Billy Smith and Ron Hextall are.

#10 Dan Moser

Never one to shy away from contact Dan Moser has always been a goalie who would much rather take things into his own hands than have a skater on his team intervene. In his first game playing roller hockey in Edmonton as a 17-year-old the first shot of the game was a routine glove save. As the player who shot the puck skated by Moser the player gave him a slash, not a hard one mind you, to his outstretched catching hand. A harmless play to most, but this rookie net-minder decided this was his time to set a precedent in the league, he was not a goalie to be messed with. Moser threw the puck from his catcher, followed the skater to the corner and gave him a nice two-hander to the back of the leg. A fracas broke out as players paired up and was the dust was settled offsetting penalties were announced and Moser received 2 minutes for slashing, and surprisingly was allowed to remain in the game, which his team went on to win. Needless to say, Moser's point had been made and his crease was avoided by opposing players for the rest of the season.

This particular slash has been named the Mos-Axe by Moser's teammates and to this day you can hear calls from his team's bench yelling: "Give him the Mos-Axe Mo!

#9 Jamie McLennen

After surrendering 5 goals in a playoff game against the Detroit Red Wings, Calgary Flames Goaltender Miikka Kiprusoff needed a break, enter backup goalie Jamie McLennen. His first touch of the puck was a wild attempt to play the puck behind his net and then for some reason he decided to give Johan Franzen a nice hard slash to the midsection, a place where padding can be limited. McLennen was ejected from the game and given a slashing penalty, and Kiprusoff was forced to reenter the game to clean up. A rather stupid gesture from a guy whose only job was to let Kipper rest every now and then. What was his intention? To hurt a Wing for the next game in the series? Perhaps he was just letting us know that his time in the NHL was up. I do not believe McLennen played another game.

#8 Mike Smith

Long before he was a Dan Ellis problem (from the famous twitter meme: #DanEllisProblems) Mike Smith was an Aaron Voros problem. In this clip Smith takes a hard whack to Voros' knee (a personal favorite of mine) before giving him two shots from behind with the blocker and then covering the puck. He then procedes to feed Voros a catcher shot and then drops the gloves and goes with him for a bit. A classic case of a goalie deciding he needed to stand up for himself because no one else was getting the job done. Neither one of these guys plays very much in the NHL anymore.

#7 Dwayne Roloson

A goaltender whose stick work is a little underrated, probably because this cagey veteran knows how to get away with a slash or two. In this clip with the play seemingly dead Columbus Blue Jacket tough guy Boll falls right on top of Roloson. He immediately lets Boll know he is in the wrong by jumping on him and exploding in a fury of punches, before doing the enforcer a favour by not finishing him off with his blocker. After the rough stuff passes Roloson decides to stay in Boll's face and let him know exactly what he did wrong, and what he should be ready to expect if he comes close again.

#6 Jack

Who Jack is, I don't know. What level he plays at, I have no clue. Where he is now, beats me. All I know is I like this kid's swagger. Remember kids, when the puck is covered, it's covered.

#5 Sean Burke/Garth Snow

This really has more to do with one Matthew Barnaby, who is a squid in his own right. Above he goes right after Sean Burke and proceeds to get his face punched in by the goaltender. Bellow Barnaby fakes an injury, has the training staff come out to the ice, and then jumps goalie Garth Snow, who is now the General Manager of the New York Islanders. On the plus side, Barnaby recently said he was going to donate his brain to science (a "no brainer" he said, I wonder if he got the word play?) so one day maybe we will know what exactly he was thinking then he jumped these to tendys who have never been shy to fight.

#4 Justin Pogge

Pogge, Pogge, ring any bells? He won the World Juniors for Canada, wore his hat sideways for the celebration. He was so good in fact that the Toronto Maple Leafs decided to trade Tuukka Rask to the Boston Bruins for a bag a pucks. Good move...... Anyway Pogge clearly did not like the goal that was scored on him. He pushes a player out of the way, screams at the ref, gets kicked out of the game, knocks the net over, and smashes his stick. Say what you want about Pogge's skill (he will never be an NHL goaltender) but the guy knows how to throw a tempter tantrum. That must be why the Leafs traded Rask, no way he can top that......right? Right?

#3 Tuukka Rask 

The shootout, in this case the goalie's nightmare. Rask, who currently plays for the Bruins, and quite well I might add did not like the calls made on the shootout goals he surrendered this night. Say what you will about the Leafs scouting/drafting, but man do they like some crazy when it comes to young goaltenders!

The first one should have been called dead, and the second one Rask believes went of the post. Rask screams at the ref, attempts to destroy his stick and trips before kicking in the doorway he enters. The piece de resistance comes when Rask leaves and then hurls a milk crate on the ice, which begs the question: what the hell is a milk crate doing in the pathway from the ice to the baby Bruins dressing room?

Just to clarify, the list stops at 3 because Billy Smith and Ron Hextall took crazy to a whole new level. I suggest checking out some of their clips if you have a chance. These guys were leg breakers!

So who did I miss? What events should I have included?

Saturday, March 5, 2011

The Official Oiler Spill Podcast: Episode Four: Enter Dickie "Dunn" Shilling

Here it is FINALLY Episode Four

My guest is the only Flames blogger worth reading, though it's ben a while since he blogged, Richard Shilling of PST Free Hockey fame. We talk about the Flames and some other stuff, it's a fun one. Parts are dated but whatever. Also the first edition of the Boston Pizza Finger Cooking Rant, give cooking the finger tonight.

Hopefully you enjoyed Edmonton's Ipod, if your Ipod only has my voice on it.

InB4 the music was the best part.

Saturday, February 26, 2011

NHL Trade Deadline Day Drinking Game

Whatchu Know Bout Trade Deadline Day?

TSN has their Deadline Day coverage, so does Sportsnet and CBC and countless radio channels. Here at Oiler Spill we do things a little different. Editor The Real Dan Moser and staffer Farrel Greenspan will be playing the NHL Trade Deadline Day Drinking Game. They are spending the whole morning/day playing NHL11 on one TV and having the TSN coverage on another, oh and beers in hand. So here are the rules, this is going to get messy:

Take One Drink When:

An NHL trade takes place
----Extra drink if a Canadian team is involved

"Puck moving defenceman" is mentioned

"Veteran presence" is mentioned

"Addresses a need" is mentioned

A player is traded for "future considerations"

A commentator uses the phrase "young and exciting"

A player signs a contract extension

Any pick later than the 4th round is traded

Take Two Drinks When:

Piere McGuire makes a comment which can be construed as homosexual

The Edmonton Oilers make a trade

The Calgary Flames trade for future (picks/prospects) for nothing

The Toronto Maple Leafs trade for an American born player

Rob Schremp is picked up off waivers

You've never heard of the prospect traded

A 2nd round pick is traded

Take Three Drinks When:

Dustin Penner is traded

Ales Hemsky is traded

A 1st round pick is traded

Take Four Drinks When:

Derek Morris is traded

Brad Richards or any other hurt player is traded

Take Five Drinks When:

If TSN gets a trade wrong

Eklund gets a trade right

A lot of these rules are redundant, so feel free to follow them as you wish! Needless to say there is going to be a lot of NHL11 and drinking. Got any ideas for rules to be added? leave a comment here or on Twitter or text/e-mail/phone call/carrier pigeon/telegram/facebook

Saturday, February 19, 2011

Late Night Video: NHL 94 Cele!

Okay this is a beauty video right here.
You remember playing the old EA Sports video games as a kid for Sega or Super Nintendo?
No? You don't? Then screw off for being young!

Enjoy this great moment as the Kamloops Blazers of the WHL celebrate a win in 8 bit fashion.

Credit for this find goes to puck buddy Craig S. from Edmonton.

Too funny!

Friday, February 11, 2011

The Official Oiler Spill Podcast: Episode Al Hamilton

ANNNNNNNNNND welcome to the next edition of the Official Oiler Spill Podcast

My guest in this edition is Edmonton Oilers super fan Lee Tappenden.

Lee is a rarity right now on the internet, he is a fan who speaks about the team he loves without cynicism. The guy truly just wants to see the team win, and to be honest it is refreshing to hear him talk about the team.

We discuss all aspects of the Oilers including trade rumours (Spoiler alert: I recently spoke to someone connected to the Thrashers franchise and Mr. Zach Bogosian is not going anywhere anytime soon!) and even the Oilers Octane cheer team, and how I offended one of them. Go figure! What else? The Oilers powerplay situation, most impressive player on the team, most disappointing. We talk Oilers coaches, hell we even give predictions for the coming week of Oilers hockey!

Once again, I hope you enjoyed the show, leave some comments either below this or via Twitter: @TheRealDanMoser or even send in an e-mail:

We are always looking for suggestions and new ideas.

See ya, wouldn't wanna be ya!

Something Uplifting: No Big Game Hunting!

Spoiler: This season has not been a cheerful one for the majority of Oiler fans. I'm sure those masochists who like seeing the team lose every year are loving it. (That should probably be a link)

I have decided it is time to read something uplifting about the team. Lord knows I need it, I recently had a conversation with someone where I said I was jealous that Ted Danson's character in Bored To Death was being forced to go to a rehab facility in Arizona. Think about it a couple weeks in a nice temperature, people looking after you, making you food, telling you to take naps etc. No computer, no phone, it would actually be pretty relaxing. No drinking for two weeks? No problem. The only awful part would be eventually having to leave, and all that stupid group $hit.

Anyway I was writing about something.... here is part one of my five part or however many I feel like doing, Something Uplifting. Enjoy.

No Big Game Hunting!

Originally I had planned on doing a blog post comparing a team comprising of only 2011 UFA eligible players and then talk about if I thought that team could beat the Edmonton Oilers. After a quick look I decided that would be boring, absolutely a 2011 UFA team would beat the Oilers. Sometimes though when you look through a bag of garbage you find that one half eaten croissant and it tastes pretty good.

There are no real big fish this year that the Oilers can go for this offseason. Let me start by saying I am not one of those fans that gets pissed off when the Oilers go big name hunting because that player doesn't fit with the team or will cost too much money etc. What does piss me is when the Oilers pursue a player, hype me up on the player, and then do not get him. Waste of my time, which is not valuable (I spent almost a half an hour today making funny faces at myself in a mirror), but is time nonetheless.

Won't be happening this year though. A quick glance at the list will show you no real desirable big name free agents. Yes yes Brad Richards is at the top but I fully expect him to re-sign in Dallas so he doesn't count.

Looks like it will be a stress free no big name hunting summer for Oiler fans. The draft will come and go, maybe a small trade will be made, and hopefully some lower tier free agents are signed and they work out better than they did this season. Had I known I would have the story of Kurtis Foster's broken leg forced on me like a scene from A Clockwork Orange on a weekly basis I never would have cheered about the Oilers signing him.

There are a few smaller guys who did catch my interest, and it looks like the Oilers will have cap space and roster room, most of the bottom half of the roster is RFA or UFA. I won't talk goalies even though there are some interesting ones (Josh Harding). The Oilers are full at that position for now.


Eric Brewer - This one is more sentamntal than organizational need. I was a big Brewer fan before the team traded him for he who cannot be named.

Ian White - The guy is 26 and actually knows how to move the puck. He's not having a great season and currently makes just under $3 million. Plus wouldn't it be nice to see him succeed as an Oiler after he was moved by the Flames?

Chuck Kobasew - Could be a nice addition for the bottom two lines. The guy has speed, but really that's about all he has. I can't see him getting a raise, he is currently paid  $2.33 million by the Wild.

Scottie Upshall - Edmonton guy, I think, but I don't really see him leaving the desert anytime soon. The guy is the perfect patch player, he can play in all situations. Mac T would have given anything for a player like Upshall.

Mark Stuart - Good young D-man from the Bruins organization. He'd probably be the #1 on this team right now, given the injury situation.

Joel Ward - Think of him as another Ryan Jones, he is even playing in Nashville (click this you won't be disappointed, raer). The guy can hit and skate and gives 100%, he has 3rd or 4th line written all over him.

Curtis Glencross - Maybe we can steal him back from Calgary? That would probably feel nice.

Aaron Voros - Tough customer, and played well in New Jersey and New York before becoming expendable this year in Anaheim. Could be a nice replacement for the Stortini's and Jaques of the world.

Andy Greene - A New Jersey D-man he can play defence despite being on that awful team, he is also alright on the offensive front.

Zenon Konopka - Allows us to cut ties with Steve MacIntyre who I just don't really see a need for. Also he is actually really good at winning face-offs.

Next time, we eat the NHL.

Thursday, February 3, 2011

The Official Oiler Spill Podcast: Episode Two

Hey boys and girl(s) welcome to Episode Two!

This week I sit down with all around sports expert Greg "The Dentist" Broyde. He's kinda like Bill Simmons but with out the insane love for all things Boston. We talk Superbowl, Aaron Rodgers, Ben Roethlisberger, the NBA, Blake Griffin, Kevin Durant, the Toronto Raptors, the NHL, the Edmonton Oilers, the Calgary Flames, and the NHL All-Star Game. Wow that is a lot to talk about in under 20 mins!

Go Packers and leave me some feedback so I can do a better job in the future. Got ideas for guests/questions/topics? twitter: @TheRealDanMoser e-mail:


Tuesday, February 1, 2011

The Waiving of Zack Scortini

By Dan Moser

Zack Stortini, or Scortini as he was called by his biggest fan, was a marginal player on an awful NHL team. A lot of people are going to bitch that he should have been kept while Steve MacIntyre or Jean Francois Jacques should have been let go in his place. They are wrong. It really doesn't matter when it is all said and done. These three players barely see the ice, they do not determine whether you win or lose a hockey game. They are replaceable which will be proved next season when all three are no long part of the Edmonton Oilers team.

This much analysis is too much. Move doesn't matter. It's like saying we could have traded him for something, that is silly, who would say that? Oh yeah this guy, someone actually pays him to write his crap too! Send your empties to my P.O. Box please.

This is Zack Stortini and his answers to 5 silly questions. I included the picture because I was concerned that if someone living outside of Edmonton read this post they would have no idea who this fourth line Oiler forward is.

Thursday, January 27, 2011

The Official Oiler Spill Podcast: Episode One

Welcome to the Oiler Spill Podcast!

In this episode I interview Montreal Canadiens' Insider Etai Handman. We discuss leadership, Saku Koivu, Brian Gionta, P.K. Subban, injury woes, and problems on defence.

Hope you enjoy it, my first shot at hosting, leave some comments and tell me what you think.
Episode Two will be coming at you next week.
Email me at if you have any topics you want discussed or hit me up on Twitter.

Monday, January 24, 2011

The Chosen Podcast Ep. 3

Welcome to episode three. Some of the bigs have been worked out, length etc. Should be an enjoyable listen.

Lawrence Dushenski (@LD10) and I discuss the NHL All Star Game, have a little mock draft for fun, talk Oilers (of course), including a personal response to what I found to be a silly blog posting by one Jonathan Willis and Nabokov! WOWZA!

Post comments, tell me what you like/hate, it's the only way it will get better!

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

The Juice

I love a goalie with some flair that stands up for himself. Well played Jussi, well played.

Monday, January 17, 2011

The Chosen Podcast Episode Two

Here it is for your enjoyment, the acclaimed Chosen Podcast.
If you don't listen I fear you won't know what to talk about around the water cooler tomorrow.
In other news, water coolers still exist?